Self censorship

I'm really struggling these days. Wednesday I totally fell apart. Class left me feeling emotionally exhausted, even though it was pretty stinkin' wonderful, and I pretty much dissolved into tears right after it. Combine that with a lot of thinking on Tuesday about my grandparents getting older and the loss of my grandfather over ten years ago, some family related stress, and the fact that I had to share my testimony in ProSem on Thursday. It was all too much and I fell apart Wednesday.
To be honest, I feel better since Thursday, but at the same time I kind of feel guilty for feeling better because of the family related stress mentioned above.
So I'm struggling. I had to really think about everything that has happened in my life to bring me here to Eastern as I was preparing for giving my testimony. There were a lot of good things and a lot of bad. As I look back, I see how God really worked all the terrible things for good, and I'm glad for them. I wouldn't go back and change a single thing. There's that verse in John where Jesus says something like "This illness won't kill him, it's so that God can be glorified through it." Obviously, I'm paraphrasing it, but the point is, I can see that in so many of the crappy situations that have come my way. They didn't kill me, they have been opportunities for God to be glorified. Which is not to say that they didn't suck at the time - having my wallet stolen in Costa Rica was pretty awful - but I can see now how God moved through those situations. (That particular situation forced me to realize that I couldn't keep "playing church".) God grows us through the good and the bad. He reveals Himself to us as individuals and as a body in those moments.
The thing is, when these situations involve others, what I see as a time of growth and of the greatness of God can be perceived quite differently by the others involved. And here is my dilemma. There has been great freedom and healing in me because I have been able to own my crap - I've talked about my sins and (some) of my struggles and have also talked about the grace and mercy of God in these areas, His salvific powers.... It's a good thing to share some of that, to know that you're not alone, to be a testimony of God's fullness and healing, and to let others around you know that they aren't alone either.
There have been some issues that I've never really talked about, though. Things that I'm too afraid to mention because I don't want others to think negatively about people I love and care for. The point is, I might have mentioned one of those things here recently. It was mentioned in passing, and was really not the point of the entry, but I feel like it brought up a lot of hurt for someone else. That was not my intention. I know that God has really healed the pain I carried around for a long, long time. I know that I have forgiven. Forgiving doesn't erase the past, but it does shape the future; it means that I've decided it's not my place to judge or retaliate; there's no need for judgment or retaliation. I am the chief of sinners, and I have been forgiven; that's the example I wish to follow.
All of this to say: I took down the last entry. Because, while it was therapeutic for me to write, I don't want it to hurt anyone I sincerely love. And since it did, I apologize.