Random

I can feel a couple heavy blog topics brewin' right about now, so I wanted to throw in a little something light before I expound on issues of race and ethnicity, grace, and the city of Nineveh (in separate posts, of course), and a couple of poems (if you're lucky).

For today, nothing but randomness:

1. I'm fascinated/obsessed with Ernesto "Che" Guevara and Marilyn Monroe for reasons that are the same but different. They're both people who have come to symbolize something much greater than themselves (revolution, feminine beauty), both people who lost their lives at young ages and under mysterious circumstances, both people with an amazing potential who didn't have the chance to fulfill it.
I read Che's Bolivian Diary as well as The Motorcycle Diaries this past summer, and when I can read for fun again, I plan to read more of his works. The thing is, he's a brilliant writer, even if you can't/don't agree with all of his ideas. I loved The Motorcycle Diaries because it showed him in all his idealism, before he was so radicalized, before he was El Comandante Che Guevara. There's a hopefulness in his writing and an idealism that I can connect with. But by the time the Bolivian Diary rolls around, this has been replaced by stubborn adherence to a failed ideal. That tragedy is what intrigues me.
That's what I see in Marilyn as well. She was this young woman who'd had a rough, rough life, but she kept hoping that she'd make it. And then she did. She never really knew what an impact she had; never really knew her inside out beauty. But she also had this idealism, this optimism, about her that was just luminous. Ultimately, though, it was that stubborn lack of self-confidence and the way she was shamelessly used that led to her demise.
They say Che was executed by the Bolivian army, but they also say he was executed by the CIA. They say that Marilyn committed suicide, but they also say that she was killed by the Mafia. That mystery - and I'll admit to being a bit of a conspiracy theorist where these two are involved - is pretty interesting as well.
Ah, and as a side note, my favorite poem in the world is "Oración por Marilyn Monroe" by Ernesto Cardenal, a liberation theologist from Nicaragua. You can find it here.

2. I have always, always, always, for as long as I can remember, wished that my skin were at least five shades darker. Daggone Spanish and Italian blood! I've always wished that my African and Taíno heritage would be more apparent in this light skin. I can't even tell you the complex I have because of it. My sister is wonderfully dark, and I'm so stinkin' pale. I've had people question my Puerto Rican-ness because of it, which makes me so. Stinkin'. Mad.

3. I always have hummus in the fridge because it is a delicious and convenient source of lean protein. I spread it on sandwiches, stuff it in pitas, eat it with carrot sticks and broccoli, and use it as salad dressing. Good and versatile stuff, hummus.

4. I feel personally offended when Puerto Ricans call themselves "Boriquas" with a "Q". UGH! Spell it right if you want those Puerto Rican points! "BORICUA", with a "C". Thank you.

5. I am obsessed with the concept of grace. It's a big, big thing, and I wonder if we've softened it or skipped over it in modern US Christianity. I'm grateful I spent a few years as a "hot mess", because those years have helped me realize how wonderfully all-encompassing grace really is.

6. As I've gotten older, I realize how little I care about what people say about me. This is a big deal for a Latina where el qué dirán is always just under the surface, especially in the church circuit. So I'm not apologizing for loving hip-hop, engaging in politics, and speaking Spanish in public, among other things. Which is not to say that I'm completely free of this qué dirán thing, just that I can see myself getting there, because I'm only trying to make One Person really, really happy with me.

7. I'm much more attached to my family than most people my age. In that way, I'm so Latina.

8. Corny as it sounds, I really believe that whatever doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. The fact that Kanye sings about it just makes me more able to work his lyrics into conversation. I do love me some Kanye.

9. I miss having a tv so I can watch telenovelas, AI, House, and Bones. Also, I heart Food Network and Top Chef. Sigh. I wish I liked tv less.

10. I love the physical act of writing: the contact with paper, the sound of pencil on the page, the satisfaction of seeing lines of my own handwriting on a page.... Blogging, while fun, doesn't give me the same feeling.

So much for not going too deep....