Hello!

Hello!

21 December 2007

On vacaaaaaaaaaation!

We had a pep rally at work today. It was pretty good, although I may have been mistaken for a student not once but twice.

One of my students got me a chihuahua ornament which I thought was a clever gift.

My sister's in town, so I'm OUT!

19 December 2007

Sick day and some videos

I'm home sick today - the first time I've been sick in three years of teaching. I actually started getting sick Sunday, but I haven't been able to take any time off because this is such a busy time of year. I had presentation yesterday and I'll have more on Thursday so I can't miss those two days.
Isn't it awful when you have to schedule your sickness like this? I mean, what's the point. Plus it's such a pain to deal with the aftermath of a sub. I don't even assign readings anymore when I'm out. All I trust a sub to do is put in a movie and pass out a worksheet.... Not that there aren't good subs, just that I always come back to reading packets left incomplete and the students telling me they just watched "Ice Age". Whatever.

I hate being sick. Doesn't everyone? I just hate not being able to do anything. I want to work out but I can't breathe when I'm just sitting around, so I probably shouldn't push it. Blech....

Enough about me. This one goes out to the FOOL who tried to revoke my Puerto Rican-ness yesterday even though he knows full well that he doesn't have the qualifications to do so: "Y así le grito al villano: yo sería Borincano aunque naciera en la luna"

Something I've always wanted to do, but have never done successfully:


Love that song...

Another good one for all the Boricuas at this time of year: "El banquete de los Sánchez". Y'all know that's how we do. "Tanto chicho, tanta panza..." And how typical is that pellizquito? Ha, ha!



Gosh, that video makes me hungry! I want some pasteles, biandas, and habichuelas....

18 December 2007

Disappointed by a lack of tackiness...

So usually there are two houses on the way to my parents' house that have a Christmas tackiness face off. They try to out do each other with oversized inflatable lawn decorations and mismatched lights. There are Nativity sets, snowmen, Santas, icicle lights, blinking lights, candy canes - you name it, it's on that lawn. This year, however, the tackiness is seriously toned down. PLUS the usual house is not even decorated. WHAAAT?! Granted, there are two houses on that same road with an assortment of lighted candy canes and a whole herd of shining reindeer grazing on the lawn and several Nativity sets, but nothing - NOTHING - compared to the glorious tackiness of yesteryear.

It kinda hurts my heart.

12 December 2007

No shame

We had our second Spanish Club sale today, which went well. As I was packing things up and heading back to the classroom with my students, this kid came to me and said, "I'm switching to your class. You sexy." Are you KIDDING me?! Who says that?! I am a good ten years older than you, I'm an authority figure and you come at me like that? Can you just imagine what he's like with his peers? Goodness!

These kids....

11 December 2007

Oh-so-cheerful

What is it about this time of year that makes me get into a funk? Without fail, late November and early December suck for me. Maybe it's because it's interims time, maybe because it's so stinkin' cold, maybe because I'm stuck in that waiting between holidays, hoping for something better.... Who knows. I'm tired, overworked, and without enough time for myself. I've got things to look forward to, but everything good seems like it's a long way off....
I miss Puerto Rico. Miss Atlanta. Miss people I haven't seen in ages. On top of that, I'm restless. I can't even tell you how badly I want to go somewhere. Not just vacation, but away - away-away. Not coming back, away. I'm kicking around the idea of moving again. While moving back in with the parents isn't my ideal situation, neither is my current living arrangement. And to pay for it is just to add insult to injury, especially when I could be saving money for Philly....

Philly.... It seems like everything I want is summed up in that one place, in my plans for next year. Who knows what will end up happening, though.

Alright, so as not to depress anyone, I'm out.

08 December 2007

Wizards' game

So the Wizards suck. We lost miserably, they put up no real defensive fight, and the game wasn't too exciting. HOWEVER! I caught a T-shirt that was launched up to the nosebleeds. It's an extra large which means that I'll never wear it out in public, but I like to know that I can win free shirts. :)

One moment I was telling Michelle that no one ever launches things up into the nosebleeds and the next moment, a shirt was flying at my head. Irony...

06 December 2007

Long awaited Vietnam pics

Here are some pics from Vietnam... Long overdue, I'm sure.

Here we are in ao dai - looking fabulous. I got so many Indian comments in my ao dai...





At our favorite fast food place reading the menu as best we can.




On the back of Mr. Giang's motorbike.


Trying on pants at the market. This is where all shame flies out the window. Good thing I'm not too shy.
More to come at another time....

Looking back on the year because it's a snow day...

1) Where did you begin 2007?
Ummm, I totally can't remember... It was either church or my parents' house....

2) What was your status by Valentine's Day?
super single. Quite frankly, I'm not a Valentine's Day kinda girl even when I'm dating. I'd much rather not deal with the crowds and sit around at home eating Indian take-out and watching movies on the couch.

3) Were you in school (anytime this year)?
Well, I work at a school, so yes.

4) How did you earn your money?
Teaching Spanish

5) Did you have to go to the hospital?
Nope.

6) Did you have any encounters with the police?
I got pulled over for doing 45 in a 25 zone just before I left for Vietnam. It was a female cop, so there was no getting out of it.

7) Where did you go on vacation?
Technically, Vietnam, although that was more of a working vacation, minus the trip to Ha Long Bay, most beautiful place on earth.

8) What did you purchase that was over $500?
A new computer to replace the one that was stolen, and my trip to Vietnam.

9) Did you know anybody who got married?
Yes, but I was fortunate enough to not have to go to any weddings.

10) Did you know anybody who passed away?
Wow, actually last year was the first year in a long time when I didn't lose anyone I cared for.

12) Did you move anywhere?
Almost did, but not quite.

14) What concerts/shows did you go to?
Maná - so fantastic! Also I saw Wayne Wonder and T-Pain

15) Are you registered to vote?
Of course!

16) Who did you want to win American Idol?
I remember being okay with Jordin Sparks winning, but I know she wasn't my number one choice. The bad thing? I don't remember my number one choice...

17) Where do you live now?
VA, and becoming okay with that.

18) Describe your birthday.
Geez, I think I went out with Maggie... Yeah, that's what we did.

19) What's one thing you thought you'd never do but did in 2007?
I'm copying the answer that the person before me wrote: Fall for a jerk. Also, be pursued by a professional athlete (granted, this was in Vietnam), eat eel and frog, ride a bicycle 20 km, travel to the other side of the world, defend myself in a non-European language, break my nose, and be considered tall

20) What has been your favorite moment?
Vietnam - all five/six weeks there, seeing Bethany for Thanksgiving, and countless others.

21) What's something you learned?
I am much more sure of what I want than most people my age, I'm a simple girl, and I'm not always as tough as I think I am.

22.) Any new additions to your family?
Not officially, but I will soon have a brother-in-law. It feels like he's already family. :)

23.) What was your best month?
July/August. It's a toss-up.

24.) What music will you remember 2007 by?
The latter part of the year will be heavily influenced by Kanye West and Alicia Keys. The first half of the year by Maná.

25) Who has been your best drinking buddy?
My Nalgene bottle... I'm not much of a drinker.

26) Made new friends?
Sure.

27) Best new friend?
She's an old one: Bethany. Best friend that I've reconnected with? Sammy.

28) Favorite Night out?
Nights out with my girl BK. :)

05 December 2007

Blech

Because life can always be summed up in a song, this is the one for today: "Lesson Learned" by Alicia Keys.

I hate cop outs and the path of least resistance. Nothing worthwhile is easy to get.

03 December 2007

To think that I hate Faulkner for his stream of conciousness...

It's been a hot minute. I've been so busy with meeting after meeting, working out, all that jazz... Busy busy. There's been some craziness at work - beaurocratic foolishness - that has made me not love every moment of my job. That's a feeling I hate. I love my students, love the classroom aspect, freakin' love the extracurriculars, but I hate the beaurocracy of it - the silly non-teaching things like standing in the hallway (as opposed to talking to my students), filling out forms, being a babysitter... Oh well, it is what it is and there's not much I can do about it.

In other news, two weeks till Christmas break (cue happy dance here) and days until I go to a Wizards' game with the boys from Gentlemen's Club (hands down, my favorite extracurricular, no matter how unorganized). GC, to clarify, is the most inappropriately named good idea ever. It's for boys who are struggling - with classes, with discipline issues, with attendance - and teaching them the skills they need to become successful young men. The group is feeling a little more cohesive these days, and I like that. Plus, the field trips are fun.

This will be my first pro basketball game in the States, and I'm excited.

I need to get some Christmas shopping done - I got a gift for my mom and am heading to the store tomorrow to get a gift for my picky sister (she will quite literally tell you that your gift sucks) that I KNOW she will like. I'm kind of at a loss when it comes to my dad and a few other friends. Also, there's the question of J. Do I get him a little something or not? If so, how little? Something that hints at the easy closeness we've developed? Something that respects the boundaries of the time and space we're giving each other?

Time and space. Ha. We may not be hanging out outside of work these days, but the past couple weeks we've ventured back into the hanging out in classrooms territory. Here's the thing: we've switched venues. He goes out of his way to come to my room. His is at least on the way to the copy room. Mine is on his way to nowhere. I feel that this is a fair arrangement seeing as the ball is in his court (I heart the basketball analogies in this specific situation). He's the one with the issues, he can decide when he's ready.

Today at the GC meeting, we were talking about values, the things that we want in life, that are important to us... This doesn't exactly link, but in my head, it does. Anyway, as I was thinking about my own responses (top 3: challenging career, succesful and fulfilling marriage, and faith) and J's comment about the marriage and how he couldn't take nagging, and a conversation I had yesterday about not liking diamonds, I realized that I'm really a simple girl.

You don't have to dazzle me with bling or a car (though it should be nicer than mine - that's not asking for much) or your bank account. What I do want is to be dazzled by your sparkling wit, your passion for working with people, and your acceptance of my flawed state. I'll accept your flaws, you accept mine. Really, not asking for too much.

I'm not the perfect woman, not the poster child for anything, really, but I'm not presenting myself as such either. And I'm working on my known failings and willing to work on the unknown ones in the future. That's life. These are people: lovely messes that we come to love for their imperfections.

I think about this, think about how easy it is to fall for a bit of swagger because you know there's a flaw behind it, how easy it is to fall for an apology, a confession, a glimpse of weakness... It's the thing that lets you know you're not alone in your floundering, in those moments when you're trying to gather your thoughts and move forward...

This is the point of too much vulnerability - the point where I start to feel exposed. I'm not such an exhibitionist yet, so I'll cut it here. I'm out.

21 November 2007

Mission Year/Mission Life. Love God. Love people. Nothing else matters.

So I got an email from the President of Mission Year, my old friend, Leroy. He asked the ATL alums to write him a letter kind of summing up our Mission Year exprience/the effect it had on our lives, and I couldn't resist. One thing: it had be a page. I can't limit myself to a page when it comes to Mission Year. There's too much to say about it, but I tried my hand at this, and this is what I came up with (slightly over a page, btw):
Dear Leroy,

It’s been years since I returned from Atlanta – almost three and a half years, actually. Mission Year was one of the most difficult experiences of my life, but it’s also the one thing that I can point back to and say “That changed the course of my life forever”. Maybe that sounds a little melodramatic, but it’s the holiday season and it’s been a long day at work, so it sounds right to me at this moment. I think back on all the other things that I’ve done in my life, and nothing has had such a profound effect on me as Mission Year.
I’ve always said that Mission Year ruined my life in a good way. Even now, three years out, with cable television and a car and a life in the suburbs, my life is radically different because of my experience in Atlanta . It took me a while to get over my suburban guilt, I won’t lie, but in the end, I decided that Mission Year wasn’t meant to make me feel bad about living in the suburbs. It was about exposing me to reality, forcing me to look at society and my individual role in it; and making me realize that life is ministry. That’s where I am today. Yes, I’m living in Northern Virginia , but I’m carrying on with the ideals of Mission Year: I live and work in the same neighborhood. It’s where I shop, where I hang out, where I spend my time. I have a vested interest in my community. Maybe I’m not buddy-buddy with my next door neighbor, but I know this community. I hurt for it, I care about it, I need it to work. Here’s the thing: it’s the same community that I was completely unattached to pre-Mission Year. In fact, I loathed this community. Not even kidding. But now that I’m back, I can see that God cares for this place, too. God wants to work here, too. And the other thing: it’s far from perfect. The problems I learned about in the city are here in the suburbs, and as my particular community experiences a shift in demographics, it’s becoming harder and harder to hide these issues.
I’m currently in my third year of teaching, a career that I say I stumbled into by accident, though I know full well this was no accident. I teach at a local public high school where I’m one of ten over-worked and under-paid “World Language” teachers and one of two teachers who work with the Spanish for Native Speakers program. That alone should give you an idea of the types of kids I work with. In a community that is quickly becoming more anti-Latino, I have the privilege of instilling pride in these children: pride in their culture, in their language, in all that they are and can become. I remember at the closing retreat saying through tears – thanks Mission Year – that I wanted to do something for “my people”. And that’s what God has me doing here, in the community I thought I hated. I see the problems of the inner city here as well: violence, single parents, poverty, gangs…. I can still be involved in working for social justice; I can still work one-on-one with these struggling kids and point towards something better, something beyond this reality.
That’s Mission Year’s legacy.
And I really mean that it ruined my life in a good way. I can’t sit by and watch all this happen; I have to do something. I can’t store up material things because there’s so much need elsewhere. I mean, Mission Year even messed up my dating: I am now terminally single and entirely too picky. Just kidding! I’m hoping it’s not a terminal condition, but the pickiness is totally true. Alright, I’m on my way to being over the one-page limit, so I’m going to wrap this up, though I’m still going to move on to page two. In addition to the work of the past three years, I’m hoping to continue on in my “Mission Life” by earning a Masters in International Development. Not only did Mission Year ruin my undergraduate career, but it may also ruin my graduate studies. What can I say? I’m a glutton for punishment. Of course, that all depends on whether or not I can ever figure out how to write curriculum vitae.

And seriously, Leroy and the rest of the Mission Year family, thanks. Because even though at times it sucked and I hated it, Mission Year is the best experience of my life thus far.


That is what I sent back to him. It's not exactly what I expected to write, but that's the course it took. I'd planned to be more witty, because in person I like to think I'm pretty clever and fairly amusing, though this doesn't always translate well into written communication without the use of - God forbid! - emoticons. Instead it's about community, which was the hardest thing and the best thing about Mission Year. It is what it is.

I haven't been able to stop thinking about all the other things I could have said after writing it. I could have said something about J, and the fact that what I love about him (did I just say that?) is that he's passionate about all the crazy kids I'm passionate about, that he loves to work with them, that he also tries to understand them and connect with them. I think we both do in our own ways.... Anyway, it must've been that terminally single thing that set me off thinking about J. Even if officially we're not anything, I don't feel totally single because of him. He's someone who lives out a lot of the MY ideals that I hold dear, and that's a rare thing. Also rare, the baggage he's bringing with him. Good news/bad news. *sigh* It is what it is.

More things I wish I'd said: that I still drive a 1991 Toyota Corolla (with a leaking radiator) because I don't see the point in trading up; that the friendships I forged in MY are some of the strongest ones that I have; that I still refer to Atlanta as the best year of my life. I love, love, love my job, I spent an amazing summer in Vietnam, I do so many things, but nothing compares to the rightness of place/occupation/company that I experienced in Atlanta.

And about those friendships, my two former roomies are absolutely the first people I turn to when I need help. They know me better than anyone else. Better than my parents. No joke. Atlanta was the first place where I felt like I was fully myself. Not that I was frontin' my whole life, just that in Atlanta I began to experience a vulnerability I'd never let myself feel before. I was more flawed and broken there than anywhere else, but at the same time, I was more perfect and beautiful.

I don't want to relive the experience; I know that's impossible, and it was so hard that I don't want to go back, but I appreciate every moment. The comments as I walked down the streets, the scent of hot asphalt and diesel, the symphony of gunshots and train whistles every night... So much happened. So much beauty and growth and education. I love it. Seriously, it changed my life.

There's no way I could sum up the impact of Mission Year on my life in one page. I'm still sorting through it all. Gathering (that makes me think of J. straightening quizzes on his desk...) my thoughts. Three and a half years out, I'm still wrapping my brain about the profound impact of Mission Year on my life. That's a good thing. Really, it is.

Anyway, this is getting much too long. Check out Mission Year, if you haven't already. If you're tired of the status quo, of coasting through life, of sitting by - it's for you.

16 November 2007

Brief and mostly pointless

Gar-Field won the game of the week.

I'm so proud. :)

In other news, my best friend, BK, is coming up from the ATL to spend Thanksgiving here. We've both been having a rough time these past few weeks, so it'll be good to catch up, go out, and wreak havoc the way we do. I miss her a ton; haven't seen her since June and Lord knows I need her perspective right now. I'm looking forward to some shopping fun and lots of laughs. That's my girl - like a sister - and I'm counting the days till Thursday so we can hang out.

This weekend, I feel a bit more sane than last. Not totally normal, yet, but working on it. You do what you can, you know? One day at a time, sometimes a minute at a time. Sometimes a breath at a time.

Oh! And I have a pseudo-date tomorrow night. This guy from church called me up today. I've been out with him a couple times before - nothing serious - so it's not totally weird. He was wondering if I was going to this church thing tonight - I wasn't - so he asked me to go to dinner with him tomorrow night. I guess I'm tired of this break, tired of missing the boy, tired of needing distraction; I said yes. Now I feel a li'l awkward. Just a li'l bit, like maybe I'm using him. Gosh, I'm a terrible person. Except that he is cool, and I find him interesting, just that I'm not at all romantically attracted to him. And that has nothing to do with the other boy, that was the case before. Whatever... Maybe it'll be good for me?


Right now I feel almost okay. And when I think about hanging out with BK, it's all good. Ha ha. The two of us are trouble. Can't wait. :)

14 November 2007

Vote or die?

Vote for Gar-Field High School for Fox 5's Game of the Week. Do it obsessively. I do.

http://fimsupport.zeb.hostguardian.com/poll-hs/

12 November 2007

Ayer

Took a long walk with Rae-Rae yesterday. Saw a white tailed deer cross the path we were walking through the woods - this crashing through brush, a flash of tan, a leap across the gravel, a white tail, and gone. It was pretty surreal.

We walked a little over four miles, all the way down my street and back with a detour through the woods until the path meets the road on the other side of Lake Ridge Park. Down at the end of the street, I looked up and saw a hawk. I'm not usually a nature girl, really I'm not, but there was something in that moment that clicked. And the following started coming to me then.

Today, I went for a shorter walk with Rae-Rae, saw a feather on the path in the woods, remembered my hawk, and thought that I had to come home and finish this one. It started out differently in my head, kind of took off in a different direction once I started writing. That happens sometimes. Must've been what I actually needed to tell myself.... Ah, and to the non-Spanish speakers, my apologies - this came to me in Spanish. What can I say? I can't keep languages straight in my head....

Ayer - historia de un vuelo

Ayer lo vi.
Ayer, domingo, aunque él no lo sabía.
Lo vi con las alas estrechadas
flotando sobre las corrientes de aire que yo
jamás conoceré.
Lo vi y en ese momento,
con el viento fresco de otoño molestándome los ojos,
sentí una nostalgía tan profunda.
Nostalgía casi inapropiada
porque nunca he conocido lo que se siente
allá.
Arriba.
Lejos de todo, de todos, de la gravedad que me mantiene aquí
estancada.

Pero en ese momento, viéndolo flotando
sin mover esas alas enormes,
qué celos me han entrado.
Es lo único que anhelo.
Lo único que anhelé ayer, lo único que sigo anhelando:
flotar
sobre esas mismas corrientes de aire
sentir ese vientecito molestándome los ojos y llorar sin pena sabiendo
que allá nadie me verá.
Nadie me dirá que
sobreviviré.
Que saldré de ésta.
Que puedo encontrar algo - alguien - mejor.

A él nadie le dice eso.
Cuando viene ese viento
a agitarle las lágrimas, él las puede soltar
sin pena alguna.
Qué libertad plena.

Ayer lo vi
y mi alma se encogió, adolorida por el anhelo,
la nostalgía,
los celos.

Lo quise seguir hasta allá
hasta el cielo inmenso, azul y frío
en esta época (noviembre, el mes más solitario de todos),
y volar.
Volar, volar, volar hasta escaparme de su recuerdo,
hasta escaparme de mi debilidad tan obvia y vergonzosa,
hasta escaparme del dolor que me ahoga.

Y mientras volara, lloraría.
¿Lloraría?
¿Al frente de tal libertad?
¿Lloraría?

Quizás no.
No, no.
Solamente me quedaría volar para
poder aprender a respirar
nuevamente,
para aprender a querer nuevamente,
para aprender a ser
igualita a él.

Ayer lo vi.
Y hoy me sostiene ese recuerdo.
Estoy estrechando alas metafóricas,
flotando sobre corrientes que me suben y me bajan.

Sobreviviré.
Eso lo supe desde un principio.
Pero lo que quiero no es sobrevivir, sino
vivir.

Vivir en una libertad plena.
Respirando profundamente del aire que me sostiene
sin importarme lo que me digan.
Si me toma meses de supervivencia para
que llegue la vida, que así sea.
Días, meses, años
- ay, Diosito mío, que no sean años -
de supervivencia, esperaré.

Porque estas alas algún día me
llevarán lejos de aquí.
Flotaré.
Escaparé.
Viviré.
Como lo anhelé ayer.

08 November 2007

Nothing profound

Week two and I'm making it. Half way to my goal. And then? And then who knows... But I'm making it. Some days are easier than others, but like I said, I'm half-way there.

I made it through the end of the marking period. Tuesday, our work day, the lights went out and stayed out for a good while. They finally came back up, we were told we couldn't turn on the computers until further notice, then the lights went out again. By the time we were allowed back on our computers, we had just over an hour to get grades in. What a mess. As if this time of year weren't stressful enough... I definitely didn't have enough grades for my A2 classes because of all the shuffling and the opening of the new section and all that jazz, but grades are done. Phew...

The workday helped this week go by faster and this coming Monday is Veteran's Day. Two short weeks in a row? I'm not complaining. The week after that is Thanksgiving, and then begins the countdown till Christmas break. Can I tell you how badly I need a vacation? I'm counting the hours till the weekend. Monday will be blissful, I know.

The roommate's out of town, too. She left today and won't be back till Sunday. TIming kinda sucks, but I'll take full advantage of having the apartment to myself. Maybe I'll clean, maybe I'll dance around in my unders while vacuuming, maybe I'll blast Ne-Yo to my heart's content (he's 25, so my crush on him isn't weirding me out anymore).

I realized today what great students I have this year. Yes, 2nd block irks me at times - they really should get their work done PRIOR to class - and I've got a few knuckleheads here and there, but by and large, they're freakin' great kids. I've got a couple who are a bit too open with their crushes (on me), which makes me beyond uncomfortable, but mostly they're entertaining. I love that we can joke around, but still have that level of respect. And I really feel like they're learning, I mean, my 6th block is rocking their accent marks :).

Alright, so I spent money I don't have and treated myself to three fitness DVDs for $25 total, so I'm off to work out.

30 October 2007

Soundtrack of my life

If my life had a soundtrack, these past few weeks would be a musical rollercoaster of love songs. From the sappy unrequited love tear-jerkers to the independent woman anthems to the in love with love songs, they'd all be there. A veritable smorgasbord of love songs. But this week? This week I'm a bit of a mess. I've made a decision that I honestly believe was a good one, but it was one of the toughest decisions I've made in a long time. I don't regret it, because it's the best option for both the boy and me, but it's been rough for us both; I hate to see him hurting, and he hates to see me hurt, but it is what it is. And just to provide a little more insight into my mess here's my life in pop music:

1. "Hate That I Love You" by Rihanna and Ne-Yo - At the risk of sounding like a sentimental fifteen-year-old, this song is way too appropriate. I don't think I've ever heard another song that captures everything I want to say so perfectly, and it kind of embarrasses me that it's precisely this song that does that. But seriously, "Must everything you do make me wanna smile? Can I not like you for a while?" And that's exactly the situation I'm in - that we're in. And the video? It's just good.

2. Speaking of uncommonly good videos: "I Want You" by Common. Sample lyrics: "A hint of perfume that reminds me of you". How perfectly does Common capture that nostalgia for something that was and that's missed? Plus Kerry Washington is seriously gorgeous and how sexy is Kanye? The video is high class, and so's the song.

3. "¿Quién te dijo eso?" by Luis Fonsi - "Who told you that I sleep soundly and I never dream of you?" and then "Don't believe them when they say I don't love you, oh how they lied to you." Gosh, I'm a sappy mess. Ha, ha... But it's a song about hanging on to the idea of making things work, but still taking a step back.

4. "How Far" by Martina McBride - The ultimate "taking a break" song. I'm probably the person she's singing to in this song 75% of the time. The other 25% of the time I'm saying "how far should I go?" But, yeah, way too appropriate. Plus her voice just gives me chills at that one part: "Out of this chair, just across the room? Half way down the block or half way to the moon? How far...."

5. "Encontrarte es una historia que hoy deberían publicar" by Fiel a la Vega - This is for those flashbacks. "I only want to know if in the curves of your chest you hide all of my secrets.... Nothing can make me change. My luck is miraculous. Finding you is a story that they should publish today." It's about that quiet intimacy, the miracle of trust, of taking a risk on someone that you care for without knowing how things will end up. "Throwing yourself on my chest, you reaffirm with a kiss that though this is only a moment, this love might endure." Sheer beauty, this song.

6. "Labios Compartidos" by Maná - Make of this what you will: "I can't share your lips.... Once again, my stupid mouth falls on your honey skin..." Now, don't get me wrong: I am not sharing his lips, but there is some baggage that needs to be dealt with, and I feel like I'm sharing those lips with all of that mess. I also love how Maná can take the imagery of the lips, the mouth, that hint of a kiss throughout the song. Oh, the sexy.

7. "Shawty" by Plies feat. T-Pain - "Even though I'm not your man, you're not my girl, I'm gonna call you my shawty... and we're not doin' anything we're not supposed to do". 'Nuff said. You don't even have to listen to the rest of the song.

8. "No se me hace fácil" by Alejandro Fernández - "Let me think about you once again... it's not easy to disentangle myself from you." Basically that this isn't easy. It's not. And of course, Alejandro Fernández has one of the finest voices I've ever heard: so much richness, a hint of smokiness; it's effortless and powerful.

9. "Lloré lloré" by Víctor Manuelle - I couldn't leave my love, Víctor off the soundtrack. "I cried and cried, and I now I don't want to cry. I cried and cried, and now I don't want to suffer any more." Not the most appropriate, but that salsa rhythm and Víctor's sexiness gets the song on the list.

10. "You Make Me Better" by Fabolous feat. Ne-Yo - "I'm a movement by myself, but I'm a force when we're together." LOVE THAT! Yeah, it's true. Plus, Ne-Yo is just adorable - wait, he's young isn't he? Sucks...

11. "No One" by Alicia Keys - "I just want you close, where you can stay forever.... People keep talking, they can say what they like...No one can get in the way of what I'm feelin'." Yeah, that sounds about right.

12. "El autobús" and "Miedo" both by Pepe Aguilar - I couldn't pick just one of his songs, so I'm putting them both at number 12. The first: "I'll try to erase your fingerprints from my skin. This city smells like you, sadly, of you. What I want to do is forget your love...even if I have to die anesthetizing (is that a word in English?) the desire; maybe I won't think of you so often." The second: "Fear of feeling alone even if I have you, fear of not feeling your hands on my skin, fear of not knowing what you think - do you miss me?.... And putting myself before the world without a mask isn't fair". Dead on, Pepe.

13. "Entra en mi vida" by Sin Bandera - You can't have a soundtrack of embarrassingly sappy love songs without Sin Bandera. "Entra en mi vida" is arguably the sappiest of them all, but it sums up the whirlwind that has been the (beautiful) mess with the boy. "I started out missing you, but I began to need you soon after" and "You spoke to me, you touched me, and the illusion was born... come into my life, I'm opening the door" speak to the cheese and intensity of everything that's gone on. It's about falling for someone almost instantly - that instant chemistry that you sometimes find, for better or worse. I'm totally standing up for this fine bit of pop cheese.

14. "Rehab" by Rihanna - "You gotta go, I gotta wean myself off of you." For that line and many others, this song is a staple in my life these days.

15. "Ojalá pudiera borrarte" by Maná - Sample lyrics: "If only I could erase you from my life forever, so I wouldn't have to see you again.... Not even in dreams." and "How can I erase your kisses? They're tattooed on my skin. I'd like to run away and erase you from my soul.... or that a miracle would occur, something would occur, that would bring me back to you." This is the song for when it's all too much, and I'd rather give up. It's the song for when I'd rather not take time or space; when I'd rather not do the right thing. It's a good all-purpose one. Not even in dreams... Mm...

Bonus track: "Irreplaceable" by Beyoncé - this is undoubtedly for my stronger moments, those moments of bitterness when I have to get Puerto Rican on his behind. When I have to pump myself up and remind myself that I really am a tough chica - and smokin' hot to boot. ;) Again, the lyrics aren't 100% dead on, but that chorus is irresistible.

So looking back, this is both super sappy and super vulnerable, for me at least. Blah. Whatever. It is what it is. I'm a bit of a mess. A little weepy, nursing a heart that - if not broken - is definitely bruised, and trying to make sense of a situation that doesn't make much sense on a good day. I'm not apologizing for it.

Oh, and PS - I think I saw the boy's ex at Target today. I heard a vaguely familiar voice talking about dogs, and I thought, Oh my gosh, that's her. Of course, I'm not 100% sure about that, just a sneaking suspicion - too many coincidences...

07 October 2007

Out of hiding

It's been a hot minute. Since the school year began, my life has been entirely too busy for me to blog. Plus, my Internet is down.

I've felt at times that I'm living in a telenovela, but now, a month and some change into the year, I feel like my life is getting back to normal. Or as normal as my lfe can possibly be right now.
I'm busy: six classes (instead of the standard five), Spanish Club, EDGE Club, Gentlemen's Club (the most inappropriately named good idea in the world), church, oh, and the boy.

Yeah, that's right. I've kinda been seeing this guy and I'm enjoying it. Enjoying it very much, actually. Which scares me - of course, right? I mean, I am the commitment phobe. But the nice thing is that it's not that serious, yet. At least not officially. He's busy, I'm busy, but we make time. I see him everyday - not even kidding - and right now, I'm enjoying it.

And maybe it'll cause a little controversy or it'll generate some rumors, but I'm not doing any of this for anyone else. That's the conclusion I'm coming to these days: I. Don't. Care. Maybe you don't like how I do, maybe you don't agree with my politics or you don't like my style or you don't like my Spanglish life: I don't care.

It seems an important lesson to learn now at twenty-five instead of finding myself ten yaers from now still trying to please people, to live up to expectations, to fit into the box that's been put together for me...

I guess I'm not making a whole lot of sense. I'm tired - a little sleep deprived, maybe - and hyped up on the weekend vibe...

On that note, I'm out.

23 August 2007

AmeRicana

So I was driving to the grocery store, running some errands for my mom today. I had my window rolled down, listening to some music (in English, quite unusual for me) and was waiting to turn out of the development when this kid who's in a car that's speeding past me sticks his head out the window and yells: "GET OUT!"

I sit there for a minute, in shock. What did he just say? And then it's clear. This little punk told me to get out. Get out of what? My own country?

I didn't have time to give him the history lesson: No, punk, I'm PUERTO RICAN. That means I'm a US citizen. No really, I was born a US citizen, and so were my parents and so was my grandma. My great-grandmother, she became a citizen in 1917 with the passage of the Jones Act because the US needed some more manpower to help fight in World War I and President Woodrow Wilson thought he'd pick up some soldiers in the US's Caribbean colony. And actually, my daddy is a colonel in the US Army. So, what was that again? Get out? Yeah, I thought so.

This, I'm sure, is a result of the anti-immigrant sentiment that seems to be settling on this nation. Personal baggage and politics aside, I know that immigration cannot continue unchecked at the same pace; not only for the good of the US, but also for the good of the nations that are losing hardworking citizens by the thousands. I KNOW this. Something has to be done. But at the same time, this crackdown has allowed for all these prejudices simmering just under the surface to rise. And I can feel it.

I'm a well-educated woman. I know the difference between lay and lie, between good and well, between your and you're; which is more than I can say for a large number of "real" Americans. ;) I've been in this country since I was four, and I'm an American. Not only in the broad continental sense, but in the specific estadounidense sense - I'm from the US. And what would the US be without that ethnic diversity? Not the US, that's what.

I'm a brown-eyed, brown-haired, brown-skinned Latina, and I can't hide that. My mouth spills forth both Spanish and English with equal ease. I'm that border child, the one with a foot on each side, blending together a hybrid culture. And I'm proud of that. But having said that, I have just as much right to this land as the blondest, tallest, whitest person.

And even if I didn't have that right, that cowardly act, that shout of "GET OUT!" as you zoom by safely in your car, that's not going to get anyone anywhere. Land of the brave, huh?

20 August 2007

Insomniac

I haven't been sleeping well. Haven't really adjusted to the time difference or the food difference or the differences in climate. Since I returned from Germany back in '99 (my gosh, I sound like my father...) I haven't understood the American obsession with A/C. I can't stand it. Everywhere I go, I'm freezing, and while everyone walks around in capris and tanks and shorts, I'm wearing two shirts, jeans, and a sweater. Oh, there is something wrong with me....

I'm up till four most nights. Last night, I was tossing and turning, reading, writing, looking at pictures, until midnight. Then I finally gave in and snuck downstairs to locate some Tylenol PM. I took it, then waited another hour, hour and a half, before I fell asleep. My mom woke me up at about 10 this morning, maybe earlier. I decided I need to go back to my apartment if only so that I can sleep all day, because I'm not getting any sleep at night. This'll be a rough adjustment once classes start up again.

I'm finally to the point where Western food doesn't make me physically ill, though it took a while. I guess my love for Mexican food pushed me beyond my limits until my stomach decided it really could deal with corn tortillas. ;) If only my love for an early bedtime could be so trained - granted, I've never had much love for early bedtimes, so maybe that's my problem.
On top of that, there's something wrong with my internet connection and something wrong with the USB port on my parents' computer which has made my efforts to upload all 700+ photos of Vietnam futile. Yeah, you read that right: more than 700 pics. Thank God for 2G memory cards, huh?

Other than that, I've got to go in to work a few times this week, including helping out with the Freshmen Fair on Friday and Saturday. It'll be good to get back in the swing of things.

My mom is paranoid that I may have bird flu since I'm always tired and my throat's a bit sore, but I blame the jet lag and her hyperactive A/C-fan combination, respectively. (Seriously, this house is cold!) I did oblige her in looking up some doctors that take my insurance whom I may or may not call to make an appointment. In my mind, the only things worse than going to the doctor are going to the dentist or going to DMV. Basically, unless things get REALLY bad, I'm not going.

Ugh, this is dull... I'm heading home - to my place, that is. I think I need a good work out to get the endorphins flowing and to sit in front of the tv and watch whatever Netflix pick I've got in this week. I'm craving some ché, maybe some bun cha... MMMMM! Bun cha!

I've got to call Comcast about fixing my stinkin' Internet connection. Stinkin' Comcast, charging me an arm and a leg and failing to deliver in their level of service... *sigh*

Okay, enough griping, I'm out.

14 August 2007

Back in VA

Well, I've been about four days back in country, five days out of Vietnam (I think), and a little over a week out of Vinh. I've got "Uoc Gi" on YouTube so I can get some of my Vietpop fix and I went out for pho' last night (believe it). I'm glad to see my family, glad to speak Spanish, glad to eat beans and tortillas (even though I'm Puerto Rican and that's not really MY food, per se...) but I do miss Vietnam a bit. I miss fresh nuoc mia and the simple pleasures of frozen sua chua.
The train ride from Vinh back to Ha Noi was infinitely better than the ride from Ha Noi to Vinh. It was about three hours shorter, and we were in a sleeper car which meant that we each had a bunk. Andrea was in a different room, but Anna, Eleisa, Aimee, and I were together. We clambered into our bunks (which were stacked three high on each side of the car) and read Eragon aloud while enjoying the snacks we'd purchased earlier at the bakery and Intimex.
Anna, Eleisa, and I ventured out of our room at one point to take pictures of the passing scenery: stony mountains, lush green rice paddies, cows grazing, men and women in conical hats.... Iconic Vietnam. The beauty of the country is astounding at times.
Six hours later, we were in Ha Noi. It was late - about 9:00 pm - and dark. We piled into two taxis and headed to Sandy's house (ELIC headquarters in Vietnam, as it were). I left my backpack, with Sandy's address taped to the handle, with Andrea so she could get to the place, and I got in the other taxi. What a mistake.
We were unloading at the intersection just in front of Sandy's, one taxi started off; I asked, "Where's my backpack?" The look on Andrea's face was pure regret. She turned around, running after the taxi. I stood in shock, started after her, turned back.... Anna and I waited there for Andrea, praying silently and fervently. When Andrea returned, it felt like forever, she was empty handed. There was a moment when I felt like my world burst. My plane tickets. The pictures Sung Ho had made for me. Everyone's email addresses. $100 in cash. My cell phone. The cables for my ipod. We walked to Sandy's and by the time we'd walked the block there, I was feeling more composed. Andrea wasn't, and she dropped off her things and took off again. We prayed with Sandy and remembered that her address was taped to the handle of the bag. There was hope.
Sandy reassured me that reissuing the ticket wouldn't be a huge issue, and thus placated, I settled in, called home, got a little prayer back-up, and hung out, waiting for Andrea to get back and restocking on the hygiene essentials (my overnight bag was in the backpack).
When Andrea returned, we prepared to head out to Ha Long Bay the next morning. As we were coming down the stairs to head out to the hotel, Eleisa fell hard down the marble stairs. She worried about the state of her tailbone and, overcome by hunger and exhaustion, she decided to stay at Sandy's and skip out on Ha Long Bay. We left her there, and headed out.
That night, we slept in a hotel of dubious report - not quite a hotel, a "guest house" - make of that what you will. Anna, my roomie for the night, and I laughed because the bathroom was separated from the room by a wall of glass. Fortunately, there was a curtain you could pull over it, which we did, but not after we got pictures of Anna sitting on the toilet seat (fully clothed, of course) reading her Bible while I stood outside the window with her camera focusing on the toilet paper rolls. We slept hard that night, and woke up early the next morning to head out to the Bay. We walked back to Sandy's to check on Eleisa - still sore and not accompanying us - and then went off to pick up some sandwiches (döner kebab done Vietnamese style - SOO delicious) and got a taxi to the travel agency in Ha Noi's Old Quarter.
We'd put money down on the tour to Ha Long and were one woman down, but - and this is how good God is - we got Eleisa's money back. The bus ride to Ha Long was easy - three/four hours with one break in between on a bus full of Vietnamese and a sweet little Japanese man. When we stopped halfway at a little tourist trap where no one wanted to hear my hard-earned Vietnamese and the prices where in dollars, we were in absolute shock seeing the sheer number of Westerners flowing in. I realized it'd been nearly five weeks since the last time I'd seen fellow foreigners. I was OVERWHELMED! They were speaking ENGLISH! And FRENCH! And SPANISH! Foreigners like me! What was the world coming to?!
But all was well, and we got back on our bus of national tourists and went to the Bay. We were scheduled to spend the night on the boat, so once we were there, we got on board and waited for the rest of the people on the tour: A French Vietnamese family with the daughter's boyfriend in tow, a French couple, an Australian woman with her adopted daughter and her coworker, and our Japanese friend from the bus. The boat set off. We had lunch: seafood, pork, rice, rau muong... there was no end to the food. It was wonderful. The Japanese man with us was in heaven because we didn't eat all the fish, but he sure did.
Ha Long Bay is unlike any other place in the world. I wish I could accurately describe the surreal beauty of it: the jade green waters, the limestone monoliths jutting out from the sea, the caves... It's like a scene out of a sci-fi movie, except real and all around you. Vietnam's rich legends filled with stories of dragons make SENSE in that landscape.
I took entirely too many pictures in the cave, of the stones, of boats... I gazed from afar at the cute French Vietnamese man who was on our boat (to my credit, he also gazed from afar at me). I wished to speak French or more Vietnamese - one would think that with two and a half languages (English, Spanish, and German) it'd be easier to communicate with European travellers.
After viewing a couple of caves - breathtaking, both - we went to a little market on the sea. Andrea and I bought two big bottles of water and she got a sleeve of Oreos, then rented kayaks. We proceeded to run into the cute French Vietnamese guy and his younger brother, which we all laughed off, and then went our separate ways. We were the laziest kayakers on the Bay. Andrea would take two strokes and pause for an Oreo break. Twenty minutes and a sleeve of Oreos later, we turned in our kayaks and headed back to the boat. Dinner was wonderful and our Japanese friend made quick work of the fish.
After dinner, we headed up to the top deck to look out at the scenery and catch the last of the sun. We anchored the boat, and it was time to swim. The group of swimmers descended from the lower deck and Aimee and I watched them from the top as the played in the water. The next thing we knew, the French Vietnamese brothers were up on the top deck. The stepped over the low railing (really, only 8 inches high) and stood on the ledge, mustering up their courage. My heart hammered against my ribs - jumping from the third level of the boat?! - as I watched them ready themselves. They counted in French: one, two, three, and down in a tremendous splash. It must have been quite a rush, because before long, they were back up, the tall, cute one asking me in sweetly accented English: "You do not swim?" Dazzling smile, and I was half tongue-tied: "Not well" I laughed, he laughed, then jumped again, and this time, signalled for me to join once he was in the water. Not a chance. Really, I can't tread water that well, and the water was deep enough for diving.
He jumped a few more time, then came up and sat on a bench - the same bench I was sitting on, and made small talk with the cute French accent. None of the essentials (name? age?) just travel talk (how long in Vietnam? When do you return?). And that smile of his too cute for me to think enough to ask for a name...ha, ha...
We slept on the boat, Anna and I sharing a room again, but only after spending a good long time laying on the benches on the top deck staring at the stars and listening to the strains of drunken Vietnamese karaoke from a neighboring boat. If it hadn't been sprinkling intermittently, Andrea, Anna, and I would've slept up there. As it was, I woke at about 5:30 the next morning to a spectacular view of the Bay. I showered quickly, pulled on my swimsuit, shorts, a tank top, and headed to the top deck with my sarong and my ipod. Our tour guide was up there, staring out at the ocean, and I wondered if he'd spent the night there. But we didn't talk. I took pictures as people drifted up. The cute guy came up and we looked at eachother furtively, under lowered lashes, each of us trying to work up the courage to start conversation and coming up short.
We had breakfast at 7:00, then Anna, Andrea, Aimee, and I headed back up to the top deck to catch some sun. We stripped down to our swimsuits and lay out... Nothing like lying in the sun while on a boat in the most beautiful place on earth. The boat docked at Cat Ba island and everyone left except the four of us and our Japanese friend. We only had time for the one night tour. I kicked myself mentally for not asking the cute guy's name. Oh well... Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda, right?
We picked up some more people and headed back. The next batch of tourist was heavily English speaking: a few Australians, a Brit, a couple Americans, a Canadian, an adorable Danish couple, and a cute little Japanese man who did some magic tricks. There was plenty of conversation as we sailed back to Ha Long City for lunch, and we chatted over lunch. The amount of food was staggering...
The bus ride back, I sat next to Ollie, the Brit we'd picked up at Cat Ba and Anna and I talked to him the whole way back. He's a teacher in London, and it was cool to hear about his experiences back home. Can you believe British kids might be worse than American kids? It made me grateful for my students. :)
That night, we did the last of the souvenir shopping in the Old Quarter after picking Eleisa up and settling in at Cua Giay Hotel. It felt good to end the trip with a proper touristy experience after all the work and the battles we fought in Vinh. Of course, I was also grateful that I had experienced much more than the average traveller. I'd made friends - Vietnamese friends that I care about and hope to see again. Friends that I will pray for now that I am back home.
We left Vietnam the next day. Our flight was delayed and we were stuck in Taiwan for a night due to weather. We did get put up in a luxurious hotel in Taiwan and got free breakfast and lunch there. The Western style buffet made me a little sick (where's the pho'?) but God was good to us. Vietnam Airlines even covered the last connections for the four girls who missed their flights out of LA.
I spent a glorious day with my sister in LA and am now back in VA, readjusting to the time difference, to Western food, to the pedestrian bilingualism of my life... But it's good. Vietnam was good.
I hope I can return. Not to travel, but to see Vinh; to see the people I came to know and love and talk to them again. I hope to sit on a plastic chair with my knees to my chest sipping a cold nuoc mia and laughing with my students. I hope to see God's hand moving as mightily as it did while we were in Vietnam. I know He's not done in Vinh - it feels good to say that now without fear of government spies - and I pray for that city, that bastion of Communism in a dark land... God is working there. He's been working, and He'll continue to work. And I know - I know - He will do great things in Vietnam. Believe it.

03 August 2007

Making the most of the time that's left...

Time's running out here in Vinh. I had a 7:30 am appointment with some of the students in Ms. Mai's class. We've gone out quite a bit, and I really enjoy them, especially Linh and the Professor whom I've spent the most time with. Linh couldn't go today, and neither could Ninh, but we still had a good time. We went out for mien (clear noodles), searched for a Vietnam soccer jersey (no luck), and then stopped at a cafe.
Good times all around, and it made me realize how much I will miss these people when I leave. Ms. Mai told me that they were looking for a souvenir for me, but they didn't know what to buy. I told them they'd already given me so much, I didn't need anything else.
I don't think she's going for that.
Thanh left last night and Steven leaves at four today. Our group is dwindling. There will only be five of us on the train back to Ha Noi, and it's still hard for me to believe. I already miss Marsha, miss Thanh, and I know I'll miss Steven.
The rest of the group (Aimee, Andrea, Anna, Eleisa, and me) will have a few more days in Ha Noi and Ha Long to spend together, but this still feels like the end.

Goodbyes are bittersweet.

Vietnam...

So I haven't been able to blog since the 25th. A lot has happened. The past week and a half have been a whirwind of activity. I've gone out with my students, gone to the beach four days in a row (Sat - Tues), and sung way too much. I feel like there is still a series of flash bulbs dancing before my eyes from all the pictures we've taken and there's an ache in my heart knowing that I'll have to leave soon.
Don't get me wrong, I miss my family, miss my friends. I want to tell stories and use my phone and eat rice and beans and pizza (not all at once) but, my goodness, Vietnam has captured my heart. I hope I'll be back. Really do. Back in Vinh to spend more time with the people that I've come to know. Tuesday, we said goodbye to Marsha; tonight we say goodbye to Thanh, and tomorrow, Steven goes off to Sai Gon. The rest of us leave Vinh City on Monday. We'll go to Ha Noi, Ha Long Bay, and then back to Ha Noi before heading back to the States on Thursday.

I can't believe how fast the time has gone. I am constantly overwhelmed by the grace and beauty and sheer generosity of the Vietnamese people in general and my Vietnamese friends in particular. I can't tell you how this beauty - this dusty, poverty-stricken, unusual beauty - has gotten under my skin. I want to wrap my arms around this place and package it up for when I'm home. I want to take the nuoc mia, the bun cha, the amazing sandwiches we just discovered... I want to take it all home for when I have reverse homesickness.

Bell rang, I'm off.

25 July 2007

SOS Village and a day on the town

So it's been a few days. We still only have three computers, but there are now eight people, which means that computer time is at a premium. I had a couple of lovely, lovely days, and the time is going by so fast. I can't believe I only have one more week of teaching and then we're heading back to Ha Noi. Time has really flown. Granted, last night when we went to dinner I thought to myself, "How many more nights do I have to eat noodle soup of some kind?" Those of you who know me know I'm not a huge fan of soup in general and noodle soups in particular. Pho' is the exception to the rule, but I can even get tired of pho'. Last night we had bun, which is pho' with a different kind of noodle, but don't let the Vietnamese hear me say that.... Anyway, food and homesickness things aside, I can't believe that the time has gone by so fast, and I wish I had more time here.

Day before yesterday - that'd be Tuesday - we went to the SOS Village, which is the orphanage in town. It's a series of group homes, and we visited before, but this Tuesday, we were able to spend more time with the kids. We played cards and soccer for a bit while they warmed up. Eleisa, Aimee, and I even did the hokey pokey to much laughter. We played the game where you hold hands and get all tangled up and then have to untangle each other from the knot that our hands have formed. We weren't very good at that game, but it was fun anyway, and the girls just laughed and laughed.
The two girls in my class were hanging out in the group with me and Eleisa. Once they warmed up, the girls were so adorable. Those two girls, a pair of twins, and two other girls gathered around me and the girls in my class served as my main interpreters. We all kind of separated out into different groups with different kids, and I was with those girls. We took pictures, then I let one of the twins have my camera and she took tons of pictures for me. Her sister stuck by me and held my hand, which is what people do in Vietnam when they're friends. One of the girls wants to be an interpreter, and she speaks English very well, so she'd be great at it, in my opinion. The girls were fourteen and thirteen and their lives have been too hard for them to be anything but sweet and appreciative. I felt so - full - spending time with them. We talked, they laughed at my Vietnamese, and we hung out.
It was really great and reminded me how much I want to work with underprivileged children. I could totally imagine myself living and working in a group home like the SOS Village. The kids really are well taken care of. They are bright and beautiful and bubbly. The girls invited us to come back, and I think I will go on Saturday so I can have at least one more day there.
Classes that night went well, and I enjoyed them greatly, especially my Starter class. My students and I decided we would meet for breakfast the next day and then I'd have lunch at Linh's house. I was floating on cloud nine after that.
After that, we went out for pho' (Night 2 of pho') and then hit a kem shop for some sua chua. (Don't you love my Vinglish?) I had a deck of Uno cards, and there were six of us. We had six flavors of frozen yogurt, so we decided to play yogurt Uno. You draw a two, take two bites of your yogurt, switch yogurt, draw an eight, eat eight bites, draw a reverse, switch yogurt in the opposite direction... If you're being stared at, you might as well give people some entertainment, right? ;) Anyway, we sampled all the yogurt and it was a good time.
Yesterday, I met my students at the school at 7 am. I took Anna, one of the teachers on the Ha Noi team, with me.
Three of my students were there, and one brought a friend. We rode motorbikes to the restaurant where we had some great food: rice cake type things with herbs and fried onions which you dip in nuoc mam (fish sauce). There were two types of meat involved, one of which was delicious, the other was just okay. I don't know what kind of meat it was, but the rule of thumb in Vietnam is "DON'T ASK". They ordered coffee for Anna and me; it arrived in a glass in three perfect layers: condensed milk; thick, black coffee; and a layer of creamy froth served over ice. I prayed so much that the caffeine wouldn't make me jittery, and so did Anna. Fortunately, there were no jitters and the condensed milk sure made the coffee go down without any trouble.
After that, we went to the market. I got some souvenirs because Linh is a master bargainer, and I even got a pilón for my mom. We bought food at the market, and Anna and I were so excited to see bins of spices and baskets of fish and whole chickens sitting out on tables... It was almost sensory overload, but we loved it and got pictures of some of the saleswomen; they were so excited to see their faces on the camera screen.
We headed back to Linh's house where she and Ninh prepared the most delicious lunch I've had in Vietnam while Anna and I chatted with the professor (one my students) and Ninh's friend (who speaks excellent English). The professor left early, but we stayed and ate crosslegged on a wooden bed that also serves as a table. Seriously: delicious.
After lunch, we watched tv and talked, then headed back out because Linh wanted to buy us bracelets. She's sixteen and the only daughter - one of three children - in a family that is very well off, but she's not spoiled at all. I was astounded by her generosity. She's a sweet, sweet girl, as is Ninh (she's 23). Oh! They also made us fresh passion fruit juice, which was as good as my grandma's. :)
We made plans for che and karaoke on Saturday, so I'm excited. We had good conversation and they're great people to hang out with. Besides, who doesn't like karaoke?!

Anna and I spent the rest of the afternoon sitting in Ho Chi Minh Square talking and taking pictures of Uncle Ho's statue - it's pretty awe inspiring, that giant statue in the square...

My classes went well, not wonderfully, but well enough. I had to give one class a mid term exam, and that kinda sucked, but it's over, so that's good.

I'm planning to head to the market again today to finish up my souvenir shopping. I can't believe I'll be back in the States so soon... I almost don't want to go, because things are falling into place; I'm settling in, I'm understanding more of the language and the culture and the food... But man, I would love some rice and beans PR style and a nice pizza... ;)

22 July 2007

Karaoke, bicycles, the beach, and songs

So I think it's been three days since the last post. I didn't want to post on Friday because I'd just finished teaching the worst class of my life. Seriously. Worse than any class I have EVER taught in any teaching situation ANYWHERE. They couldn't say "My name is...", but they were supposed to be on lesson 5, talking about the things that they liked. Go figure... And they were totally checked out because they couldn't understand me. Or they were pretending that they couldn't understand.
So I taught them "i'm a Little Teapot" with the motions and if they were on their cellphones or sleeping, or talking while we were practicing, they had to stand up and sing the song with the motions, which is absolutely mortifiying for them.

At least it's only once a week...

Other than that, my last two classes on Friday went really well. I LOVE that Listening and Conversation class so much. They're a ton of fun and they work their little butts off trying to communicate in English.
Friday morning, San left with his dad. He's not back yet, and I'm kind of heartbroken that I haven't been able to see him, especially since I wasn't able to get any pics of him. :(. I hope he'll be back before we leave.

Saturday, we ventured out on our bikes. Thanh sat on the back of Andrea's bike, while Eleisa and I got our own bikes. We went out for brunch - Bun which is kind of like pho' but with thinner noodles - and then rode off to the market where we bought fabric for dresses. I got this gorgeous green silk, and a turquoise one with this crazy print which I'm hoping to make a sundress out of (forgive my bad sentence structure). I also got a super cute pair of shoes for Cristina, which I bargained down from 160000 Dong to 80000 Dong. I can't even TELL you how proud of myself I am for that. As foreigners, we pay higher prices , but bargaining is an essential skill, and while I can hold my own in Spanish, with my limited Vietnamese, it's a little bit more intimidating. Body language is a good thing. And you should also start at at least half the starting price; if you know you're being ripped off (like the shoes), start even lower.
I also bought some passion fruit and an avocado (I'm thinking I'll make a little guac) to remind me of home. That parcha was delicious.
OH! And we found sandwiches! REAL sandwiches! HERE! In Vietnam! We've missed them so much, and Thanh had told us that they only sell them for breakfast, but those are lies. Hideous lies that kept us seperated from sandwiches for entirely too long. They were wonderful and we savored them at home while extoling the virtues of fresh pickles and the nice rolls... Ah, sandwiches...

Saturday night, we went to karaoke with some of the teachers - it was girls' night out. I somehow got roped into singing "Isla Bonita" by Madonna with Nhuong, and someone misguidedly told me I could sing. Eleisa and I also sang "Macarena" - did you know that song had words in English? - and we had a flashback to 1996 as everyone danced in the front. We also sang "Amazing Grace" and one of the teachers sang along. Turns out one of her foreign friends had taught her the song. She's really nice, and we've talked whenever she's around because she really likes to spend time with foreigners.

The Hanoi team came in around 2 am from Sat. to Sun. We were so glad to see them. Yesterday, we all hung out - we had pho' for breakfast with Ms. Yen and Mr. Quy and then went to a cafe for our favorite fruit drinks. After that, we napped and hung out while Steven played the guitar and we sang along. It was great to just sit around and sing and laugh. Then Andrea, Steven, and I decided it would be a good idea if we went out to Cua Lo beach on our bikes. It's 30 km - about 13 miles - and we were feeling adventurous, so off we went with a pair of water bottles, a map, and a cell phone. The scenery was breathtaking, the ride was easy. It was the Vietnam I'd dreamed of: shops lining a narrow dusty streets, people standing outside shouting, "Hello! Hello!", cows lazing on the side of the road. The motorbikes zipped past us and the trucks forced us off the road, but it was a really nice ride. I felt happy and alive; I was just glad for the movement... We stopped for nuoc mia once, then rode on to a different beach where we walked and saw women clamming with the strangest equipment we'd ever seen. Andrea and I left Steven and struck up a conversation with one of the women in our limited Vietnamese. We didn't learn too much about the clamming, but it was nice to talk.

After that, we rode the remaining 6 km to Cua Lo and stopped for nuoc mia again before parking our bikes and joining Thanh, Eleisa, and Anna. They'd come by taxi. It was good to be on the beach with a group of foreigners. Andrea and I got drawn into a beach soccer game and played a bit before heading back to where Eleisa and Anna were lounging. We actually got to swim in our suits, and not suits covered up by an extra layer of clothing. It was nice, so nice... I got a sweet tan, and a bit of burn on my shoulders, but it was totally worth it. (I promised I covered myself with sunscreen before heading out... SPF 45!)
We thought it'd be a good idea for us to all ride back Vietnamese style: two people per bike, but one bike didn't have an extra seat, so Andrea went off on a xe om (motorbike taxi), and the rest of us set off. Eleisa rode with me on the back seat nursing a nasty bruise on my right knee. She made it a few kilometers before she switched for a seat behind Steven. I got a bike that was much too high for me, and we rode about 5 km before we stopped for a flat tire on Steven's bike. Then Eleisa got my bike, and I sat behind Steven. Again, another 5 km, and a flat tire.... By now, we'd run into one of Thanh's students who was riding with a friend. The friend said she knew of a place where we could get the bike fixed and we tried to find a xe om for Thanh and I. No luck with the xe om, so the girl's mother came. The girls let Steven borrow their bike (which was very pink and had a pink bell) and took our bike to get it fixed. The mother took Thanh and I back to the hotel. There are no coincidences, right? How amazing is that that just when the tire gave out, we ran into someone we knew?! That's the kind of thing that amazes me while I'm here. I've never been good at faith, but it's been so clear to me lately that if we just take our own hands off the situation, God steps in and provides just what we need.

We went out for dinner and dessert (more fruit juice, fried bananas, and some spicy green papaya salad that was what I actually wanted for dinner) and then came back to the hotel for some worship.

It was kind of surreal to be in that room, our voices filling the room, Steven's guitar leading, some lovely harmonies, and the other four people there with the same passion. Man, that room felt good. It was nothing deep: no long winded prayers, no one speaking, just some songs, most of which came out in jumbled pieces before they were fluid and lovely, but that room felt GOOD. God is faithful. He is good and just and FAITHFUL... I am so thankful for the grace He's poured out on us, for protection and provision, for family when I'm so far from mine...

And now another week. We're halfway through this adventure; more than halfway... Time flies, right? Maybe? LOL There have been days when it's dragged, but looking back, I can't believe it's almost over. But so much can happen in two weeks. So much...

19 July 2007

Pics - finally!

So I'm hoping to post some pictures today to break up the long blocks of text. I wish I could package up a bit to Vietnam and transmit it via Internet to all of you. I'd throw in the scent of nuoc mam (fish sauce) and sweat and nuoc mia and bia hoi that pervades the streets. Then I'd add some dust, making it cling to your sweaty skin, and pouring it in your sandals. After that, I'd bottle up some sun, hot and intense. A trickle of sweat should snake down your back, right between your shoulderblades, pooling in the small of your back. Sweat should also bead up on your forehead, but it's not too bad, because you've swept up your hair on top of your head to mitigate the problem. There should be a chorus of horns blaring and motorbikes zooming by while the bicycles navigate their way on the edges of the streets. Horns, nuoc mam, sweat, and dust are unavoidable. Trash collects along the edges of the sidewalks and old women wash dishes in shallow plastic tubs on the sidewalks while streams of gray water find their way to the streets.


I wish you could see it: the beauty and the poverty of it.
I am not one of those people who longs for the majestic views of Europe - been there, done that. This, however, this hard life and the grace in every moment, that I can soak up. It is amazing. Breathtaking. I guess not everyone agrees with me, but I wish you could see it the way I do. With a mix of curiosity and wonder and weariness... I don't know if that makes sense...
So yeah, enough text, yes? Maybe some pictures?





Team Vietnam at training: Steven, Eleisa, Marsha, Aimee, Anna, Rick, and Heath. Front row: Me, Thanh, Mary, and Andrea.

There are more pics here, I think, but the computer is making me crazy. It's not showing the pics the way I'd like it to, so I'm giving up for now, but I'll definitely try to figure this thing out later... Blech technology!










18 July 2007

Better days, American food, and more nuoc mia

Well, the swelling is down in my nose; of course, I have two nice shiners now. I took pictures today, and I have the cable for my camera, but no camera. Way to go, Franny. Oh well. LOL. Yesterday was a "blah" day. We were all tired, I was sore, and we had two classes to teach. Two classes that seemed to take forever. LOL
Here's the good news: Yesterday, Andrea, Eleisa, and I made the most delicious lunch ever! Egg noodles with cheese sauce. Real cheese sauce: cream cheese, cheddar cheese, gouda melted together with a bit of milk over some nice noodles.... Trust me, after weeks of rice and fish sauce and various strange things, cheesy noodles become the epitome of fine dining. We made one big plateful, grabbed forks (FORKS! Not chopsticks, FORKS!) and dug in from the same plate. We cleaned it out between the three of us. :) And for dessert, we had watermelon. Oh, we were some happy American girls last night... We still have a jar of spaghetti sauce that we have to use, and believe me, we'll be happy to use it.
My first class yesterday invited me out for nuoc mia. There is one Korean student in that class, and three Vietnamese, so we have to speak English, and they're really curious about one another, which is good. We went to a different nuoc mia stand and sat down to enjoy our drinks and chat. We were late after the break, but we were totally practicing our English, so I'm okay with that. :)
My second class was a bit rougher. There are way too many high school boys in there - this is the class where I had to give the hitting talk. Today there was no hitting, but seven of the boys in the back totally did not do their work. So I stood by them and watched while they worked to make sure that they actually did the partner work. I hate grading, but when kids don't learn for the sake of learning, it's the only real incentive they have to actually DO the work. Blech.... My students can be lazy, but 80% of the time they at least START their work. These boys did not even do that...
After class, we walked back to the hotel and sat around in my room eating bits of food - crackers, yogurt, cookies - until Thanh broke out the icecream. Then we ate icecream and talked about sandwiches... Mmmm... Delicious sandwiches.... We hooked up my ipod to Eleisa's speakers and listened to music and clowned around. It was fun and we needed that time to unwind and refresh.
This morning we had a Vietnamese lesson, and we learned a children's song. Fun stuff, huh? That's totally the way to learn a language: singing songs. LOL It's a song about kids going to school and not crying while their mothers tend to the fruit trees and their fathers work at the factory and the grandfather plows the field. I love that I can pick out the family words and put things together :).
Speaking of families, my dad called this morning. I was so happy to talk to my Stinky (which is what I affectionately call my dad) because I haven't spoken to him since I left California. I was missing my mother tongue so much... Speaking of the mother tongue, I get to teach the teachers Spanish today. I am beyond excited, but also nervous, because I've never taught a language from scratch. I don't know if that makes sense: they have NO knowledge of Spanish beyond "te amo", so I'm starting from the ground up. But I'm just excited to speak my language, so I'm looking forward to it.
Finally, this is our last weekend as a foursome. This weekend, the Hanoi team is coming down to Vinh to teach here with us at ASEM School. I'm looking forward to seeing them, but I'm sure that the transition will be a bit difficult. Now there will be eight foreign teachers at this school; that's a whole lot for a small city like Vinh, but it will make our Sunday meetings a bit more like home, especially since Steven will be bringing a guitar.
Well, we've got lunch with one of Andrea's classes today at twelve, and after that, we're going to MaxiMark to do more grocery shopping (that yogurt goes quickly) and see my supermarket boyfriend. Also, we will be picking up our Ao Dai, after which I hope to post a picture that I will call "Ao dais and black eyes". I thought of that this morning while talking ao dais with Eleisa and we were highly amused, first because it rhymes and second because it's true.
I'm serious, these are some nasty black eyes I've got going on. The good news is that my nose looks MUCH better. It's back down to a normal size, though it's still bruised and scratched. At least I don't have as much blood in there anymore. (gross)

Oh! My mission for today is to find more things to be thankful for, so here are a few things that I appreciate:
-My tan. Who cares if they don't think brown skin is beautiful? I love my brown skin!
-Spanish lessons. Es que me hace falta mi propio idioma...
-My teammates: Andrea because she is funny, Thanh because she speaks Vietnamese, Eleisa because she is a nursing student and can fix us up. I am eternally grateful for these three women here with me, and that's not even a stretch.
-Nuoc mia. I am thankful because it is delicious and sweet, but mostly because it is COLD.
-Bottled water. It's refreshing and cold.
-Yogurt (Sua Chua). It settles my stomach, it fills me up, and it's cold. (Are we noticing a trend yet?)
-Phone calls from my dad. Nuff said.
-Maximark. Because they sell peanut butter and spaghetti sauce and bread and all other foods that remind me of home.
-God's protection. Seriously, because even though I complain, this could be much worse. And He's been so good....
-

17 July 2007

Everyday is an Adventure: A blog in two parts

PART 1: The foreign teachers interact with the locals

Yesterday was a really good day. I start with this because it's the truth, even if you walk away from this blog thinking, "Man, that SUCKS!", it was a really good day. It was.



We woke up feeling crappy (I promise, this gets better), sick to our stomachs, suffering from sinuses, covered with bugbites, and tired. But devotions were really good. We talked about Jesus' load for us being light and that we are called to help each other to carry our burdens, and it was just what we needed. It was good.

Vietnamese lessons went well. We learned what I like to call "taxi words": go straight, turn left, turn right, right here. We also learned a few other essentials (Toi muon mua chai nuoc - I would like to buy bottled water). Afterwards, I blogged - remember that confusing mess? - and then I played with the kids here at the school. We didn't have a ball, but they wanted to teach me Vietnamese. Apparently, this is entertaining enough that the nuoc mia woman's 24-year-old son and his buddy came over and sat down to laugh and ask questions. It was actually a lot of fun. The kids get such a kick out of knowing more than me, and they quizzed me hard. I had to pull out my notebook (otherwise known as my lifeline) a few times. I seriously carry that thing around with me EVERYWHERE. I don't always remember the words that I need, so I'm frantically flipping through pages trying to put sentences together. The good thing about Vietnamese is that once you learn a verb, you're set. You don't have to conjugate them, so it's easier to put sentences together. Of course, the bad thing about Vietnamese is that they have roughly 4000 pronouns (it seems like it to me) to denote pretty much any human relationship possible. I mean, there are different four different words for "aunt" that I know. Four. That is just ridiculous.



So after an hour of playing with the kids, I walked back to the hotel for lunch. Thanh's sister made lunch and it was a salty, spicy concotion over rice noodles. When I say salty, I mean it was like drinking straight soy sauce. Eleisa and I poured copious amounts of water over it, trying to take the edge off, but to no avail. This, added to my poor stomach, made me retreat to my room after drinking plenty of Pepto.



I took a short nap, then pulled it together and went to the orphanage to visit the kids. The SOS Village is a village of group homes with dorm parents. There are about 300 kids there, and we visited each house and handed out the Vietnamese equivelent of Little Debbie snacks. The kids were adorable. I met one girl who would be in my class later that evening. A few kids there get scholarships to ASEM school, which is pretty cool. Anyway, we'll be going back next week to teach English. The place should be heartbreaking, and in someways it is, but in other ways, they live like families and it's nice. I mean, the place is REALLY nice: the kids are well cared for, they take care of each other and there are no blank stares or vacant eyes. They are lively, bright children, and I can't wait to go back.

My classes yesterday went wonderfully, thank God. My first was a Listening and Conversation class, level 2, which means that they speak English. Let me tell you, after a week and a half of speaking. At. This. Speed. It was. Quite. A change. Yes? Yes. Okay.
One of the girls even told me I could talk faster, so I explained that they spoke more English than any other class that I taught, and we were able to have some conversations. It was fun. There are at least two girls in that class who live at the orphanage, and they stayed after to ask if we were going to come teach them at the SOS Village. They were so excited when I said yes. :)

My next class was a Starter class, mostly adults. They did not speak very much English, but the class went really well. I can't even tell you how intimidating starter classes are: you walk in, "Hello. My name is Frances.", you write it on the board, wait for recognition to wash over their faces. Then they introduce themselves: "My name is Phuong. I am twenty year old. I am student. I like listen to music." I repeat. Yes, that is what they said. We move on.
I had one guy in the class tell me that he was also 25. He likes football and badmitton (the Vietnamese LOVE them some badmitton!). He likes to listen to music. And he is alone. Everyone laughed. That, my friends, was his way of saying that he is single and available. The only way that he could say, "Hey, want to ride on my motorbike?" (totally a date here) with his limited English.
Like I said, the class went well. We studied the present continuous and I gave them postcards from Hawai'i and told them to tell me what they were doing in Hawai'i. I got answers ranging from the basic "I am swimming at the beach" to the more complex "I am picking coconuts". I was so impressed by their efforts and their overwhelming friendliness.

Oh! And on the subject of flirting, between the SOS Village and teacing, we stopped at Maximark, the local supermarket, to do our weekly grocery run. We go there quite often, and the workers there know Eleisa and me quite well by now, since we do most of the grocery shopping. There's this guy who works there who speaks English, and he's a real cutie, but a bit short. Anyway, we always take a shopping list and he takes it and tells us where to find things. So he was helping us yesterday and then he wandered over to the cash register when I was paying. He stood behind me as I paid and the cashier said to me, "He love you" in her limited English. I pretended not to understand. He smiled. She said it again, and then went on in Vietnamese. He translated: "She says you are very beautiful". I said, "Oh, thank you. Cam o'n (thanks in Vietnamese)." She said again, "He love you." I played dumb; he smiled. I ran out of Maximark with my two heavy bags of yogurt and icecream once I'd paid. Everyday it's something...

After our classes, one of Thanh's students took us out to eat. We went to this super cute restaurant about half a mile away. She took three of us on her motorbike, and I sat in the front because I had a skirt on. Four people on a motorbike is a common thing here in Vietnam, but it is by no means safe. However, the Vietnamese do not let you walk more than a couple blocks. Eleisa, Andrea, and I are content to walk miles and miles around town, but no one wants us to do so. So we gave in and let them drive us to the restaurant.
We had good food: fried rice cakes with shrimp inside, green papaya salad, fried bananas (amarillitos!), and this drink of mixed fruit and crushed ice in sweetened milk. It was wonderful. The place was cleaner than any restaurant we've visited in Vietnam until now.

We had a good time talking to Huong, the student, and eating, and then it was time to go home.


PART 2: "Toi bi tai nan xe may", or The Dangers of Motorbikes

Andrea and I decided we would walk back to the hotel. It was only half a mile back, and the night before, we had walked about a mile and a half. We like walking, we needed the exercise, especially after eating all those fried bananas and shrimp. So off we went. Walking back to the hotel, enjoying the cool air and the breeze and talking about our classes.
Suddenly Huong pulled up, she signalled her motorbike. Turn out Thanh had sent her back to pick us up. What do you saywhen someone comes back to pick you up? You shrug and nod, and get on the bike. So we headed toward the bike. Huong asked me to sit in the front, and I climbed on. As I was sitting in front of her, not quite seated, but in the process, the bike moved. We were all in shock, I think, and all of a sudden, we were careening towards the sidewalk. We bounced up on the sidewalk, under a tree. I thought, "Oh, we didn't hit it, we'll steer back to the street, it will be okay." And then there was another tree. We were heading straight at it, and I was in the front part of the seat. We were going to run into it, and I could see it, see it happening, and then we were there, and my face hit the tree, my forehead, my nose, my teeth rattled. I thought, "I broke my nose; I'm going to stain my yellow shirt!", and then my head rolled to the side, and I thought, "My nose isn't bleeding, maybe it's not broken." We got off the bike, and Huong was freaking out: "Are you okay?" I told her I was fine, even though I was dizzy, because I didn't want to worry her. We told her we'd help pay for the bike (it's mostly fine, she was able to drive it home) and people poured out of their homes to help us. They delivered some ice for the knot on my forehead and my swollen nose. We called Thanh and she came back. She ended up going to Huong's house with her to explain what had happened to Huong's mother. Meanwhile, Andrea and I walked back to the hotel; we really weren't very far. We did NOT want to get on another xe may (motorbike) in our skirts and with my swollen face. We didn't call a tazi, didn't go to the doctor, didn't call Ms. Yen and Mr. Quy - all I wanted to do was go home and get some ice on my boxer's face.

So off we went. Eleisa, who is a nursing student, hooked me up with some meds, more ice, and checked me out for a concussion. The girls prayed over me, which was good. And I'm looking a bit better today. Still swollen, still looking like a boxer, but not quite as bad. My lip is fat and swollen, and I've been calling it my Angelina Jolie lip. I suppose things could be worse.

Eleisa said, "You know, it's funny how Satan works." The stomach ache wasn't enough to keep me down, so he tried the tree instead. But we're here and we're fighting, and I'm nursing my beat up face and trying not to be as vain about my nose. (Dear GOD, please let me keep my nice nose... ;).) But like I said, it was a good day with a crappy ending.

Today in my Vietnamese lesson I learned to say I had a motorbike accident (Toi di thai nan xe may), which I already tried out with my little buddy, San. He was very concerned. Seriously, the kid is adorable!

I hope that my students today aren't too put off by the state of my face. We were joking that maybe now, Abbey, the Ghanaian soccer player in town won't be so in love with me if he could see me. Of course, I am still NOT planning to meet him anywhere. LOL...

Keep us in prayer though, because our health has been hit hard since we've been here. Allergic reactions to bug bites, ear infections, sinus infections, stomach woes, and now the motor bike accident... But we're fighting the good fight.

16 July 2007

Rambling on the foreign and familiar

Well, it's Tuesday here, and we just finished our Vietnamese lesson. I was going to blog yesterday, but we had a series of power outages that lasted quite a while. Imagine 93 degrees, high humidity, and no fans; sounds like fun, right? ;) I guess it wasn't too bad, but it made us all pretty lazy. We didn't want to go out or explore much.

Yesterday we celebrated Thanh's nephew's birthday. We had entirely too much food. It's amazing how a table full of food can totally ruin your appetite; I was completely overwhelmed. We invited the hotel staff and Ms. Yen and Mr. Quy, so there were about eight of us. We ate rice noodles, shrimp, beef stir fry, some kind of broth, a salad (which I helped prepare), rambutan (like lychee, but spiky), and cake. And I'm sure there was more food on the table somewhere... It was all really good. I feel like I never stop eating here.... Amazingly enough, however, all of my clothes are too big on me.

We played soccer with some kids outside the school yesterday morning, which was a lot of fun. Andrea is in agreement about soccer being the universal language. We walked from school to the hotel with the ball, and had about three conversations across a block and a half. Everyone wants to be your friend when you have a soccer ball. It's such a great conversation starter.

Last night, after class, we had some nuoc mia. This is becoming a habit for us, and not a particularly healthy one, but the nuoc mia is so sweet and cold and refreshing, that we are craving it by the end of the night when we've exhausted our cold water supply. It's nice to sit at the little plastic table, balancing on little plastic chairs on the edge of the sidewalk and sipping cold sugar cane juice. It's a well deserved treat, I think. Plus, the opportunities for conversation over nuoc mia abound. There is no such thing as personal space in Vietnam, so the tables are pushed close to one another and everyone wants to practice their English or see how well we speak Vietnamese (the answer is not very), so we always talk to people. Yesterday, we talked to a couple of older men who laughed at our Vietnamese notebooks with our careful notes on pronunciation.

After that, Eleisa, Andrea, and I split a plate of chicken fried rice (co'm is rice, ga is chicken - that's what we want) and some pickled green papaya (I love that stuff) for 20,000 dong, just a little over a dollar for three people. We decided we should not let Thanh order anymore because we are infinitely more frugal. ;). Andrea and I walked around the city after that, in search of Kem and sua chua (ice cream and yogurt) and some cold bottled nuoc (water). We were unable to find the latter, but managed to find a little shop where we bought some frozen yogurt in little glass cups. One pink, one white, and like good Vietnamese, we ate from eachothers cups.

At dinner we were making a list: "You know you've been in Vietnam too long when..." Among my favorites, "someone gives you a fork and you look at them funny", "you share one water bottle among four people", "you think nothing of double dipping"....

This is a different world here. I can feel the difference, see it, smell it, taste it. Most of my food reminds me of my seventh grade bio class where we did a lot of dissections (shrimp, crab, even chickens with their heads on - I have managed to avoid the latter). But there's something so universal in this heat, the poverty. Something universal in dusty streets and bright smiles and sad eyes. It's amazing to draw these parallels in a place that is so deeply foreign to me. I have my moments. My days of wishing for a nice, fat sandwich; some music in Spanish, maybe a car with AC... But I guess no place is really home. I'm an army brat, I should know that much at least.

Somedays I feel like I'm at the ends of the earth. I felt that yesterday, as I washed veggies while squatting on a pair of bricks on the patio. Yeah, there's no sink in the kitchen.... But at the same time, there's that common thread of food and water, the sky above, and the dust in my sandals... I am amazed at every turn. Sometimes amazed and resentful, sometimes amazed and gracious... You could all pray for my attitude; it wouldn't hurt. ;)

I guess I'm babbling. And maybe I'm repeating myself a lot, but I can't view my blog, only write in it, so I don't know what's old news.

I think we've decided to go to Ha Long Bay for the weekend so we can meet up with the Ha Noi team before they come down to Vinh. I think I need it; need some beach, some natural wonders to shock me into appreciation. The classes can tire me out. It's hard when you aren't always understood, when you get a lot of blank stares and nervouse gazes.... But it gets better, yes? It always gets better...

I'm optimistic, really I am. Just tired, a little sick, and definitely sweaty. Ha, ha... Guess it's time for lunch and a nap. Now THAT I could get used to.